Sean is done with elementary school and headed into middle school this September — 6th grade, here we come! They’re very organized in all schools these days. Both our kids came home before the school year ended and already had a list of the necessary school supplies for next year. That never happened when I was a kid.
Another thing that never happened when I was a kid was seeing this on the school supply list:
Yep, Sean needs a USB drive. For 6th grade.
Please see the title of this post.
For a lesson on responsibility, the 2nd graders had to complete a worksheet titled “If I Were in Charge.” The worksheet listed six things that students do that don’t meet expectations or break school rules. The student’s job was to pretend to be the principal and write down the “consequences” (the politically correct word for “punishment”) of each action. Here’s how Sean filled out his worksheet:
1. fighting on the playground
30 minutes on the wall
2. stealing money from a student’s backpack
5 years detention
3. pushing someone in the bus line
make them say Sorry
4. talking rudely to a teacher
make them work every millisecond
5. cheating on a test
send them to a 12th grade room
6. throwing food in the cafeteria
make them clean up the whole world
(!)
I asked Sean about a couple of these. “The wall” is part of the playground area where kids are sent when being disciplined, so that explains #1. I asked about #5, and why he said to send them to a 12th grade room: “Because 12th graders are scary.”
Well, of course!
That’s the current reading level of my genius son, who happens to be barely more than halfway through the second grade. He’s off the chart — the cards his teacher uses to track reading levels only goes up to 6.5, so she had to ‘X’ that out and write in 7.4 for him.
Am I a proud dad? Hell yes!
School is back in session, and one of the first To Dos in 2nd grade was the obligatory “What did you do this summer?” assignment.
Sean writes: “Took swimming lessons”
And then the next question is, “Why did you do that?”
He writes: “Basic survival skill”
!!!!!!
For the past two weeks, my son — and his entire kindergarten class — has been counting down the days until May 25th. That’s not the last day of school. No, that’s the day an incubator full of eggs will hatch live chicks in their classroom. According to the “Egg Countdown Calendar” on our fridge, tomorrow they may be able to see the chicks pecking at the inside of the egg as they try to start getting out. Oh, and it also tells us that the eggs sit inside the incubator at a temperature of 100-degrees, and that the incubator must stay closed these last few days in order to keep the humidity high enough to soften up the shells so the chicks can get out.
Meanwhile, in other kindergarten news, the entire class has already been taught the differences between the various types of clouds — cirrus, nimbus, stratus, etc. Oh, and Sean has recently passed his first Advanced Reading test which says he’s reading at least at the 2nd grade level.
When I was in kindergarten, we didn’t have Advanced Reading tests. We didn’t learn about clouds until 2nd or 3rd grade, and we sure as hell didn’t incubate eggs for the purposes of watching chicks hatch in front of our eyes. When I was in kindergarten, we learned about colors. We learned simple addition, like 2+2 and 3+3, and even 4+5. We learned how to tie our shoes and button our jackets. We learned, most importantly, how to get along with one another. We learned to share and take turns. We even (gasp!) took naps.
They don’t have time for naps in the 21st century kindergarten. They might sleep right through the chicks cracking their shells. Don’t get me wrong, I’m very happy with what Sean’s learning. This isn’t a complaint. It’s more of a documentation, a “is this really how much things have changed?” post. I just can’t believe what they’re teaching in kindergarten….